About a month and a half ago, the minister spoke from Acts 2:42-47 (a familiar passage, indeed). This time, I was struck by the phrase, "Everyone was filled with awe...." I highlighted it, turned to my wife, and said, "that's what's missing." From that moment, I started asking God to fill me with awe again. A handful of weeks later, I lost my job. Not quite the awesome I had in mind, to be sure.
The last couple weeks were pretty rough, not knowing where food or rent would come from. Within the past few days, however, God has shown us how He has not abandoned us! We qualified for food stamps; we qualified for Medi-Cal; we qualified for free lunch at my daughter's school; we are able to get my son into a free preschool; I qualified for unemployment; and, to top it all off, what was a side job for a while has just blossomed into a serious income. Those of you who know me can appreciate how amazing it is to have been given not just another J.O.B., but something that is almost everything I could ask for.
And I can't claim credit for any of it!
"'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty."
- Zechariah 4:6
I don't deserve any of this. All I've done is beg for mercy and fast for brokenness. While I believe there is a kind of connection between this and God's blessings, I can't be dogmatic or treat it like some kind of if/then equation. God has simply shown mercy and been good to me!
When you live with depression, times like these are indescribably refreshing. All I want to do is tell people how good God really is! I am humbled by and ashamed of my lack of faith in His goodness when things seemed darkest; but, I am so very encouraged by how His love, mercy, goodness, and all the rest don't waiver no matter how much I do!
Here is a trustworthy saying:
If we died with him,
we will also live with him;
if we endure,
we will also reign with him.
If we disown him,
he will also disown us;
if we are faithless,
he remains faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.
- 2 Timothy 2:11-13
The last couple weeks were pretty rough, not knowing where food or rent would come from. Within the past few days, however, God has shown us how He has not abandoned us! We qualified for food stamps; we qualified for Medi-Cal; we qualified for free lunch at my daughter's school; we are able to get my son into a free preschool; I qualified for unemployment; and, to top it all off, what was a side job for a while has just blossomed into a serious income. Those of you who know me can appreciate how amazing it is to have been given not just another J.O.B., but something that is almost everything I could ask for.
And I can't claim credit for any of it!
"'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty."
- Zechariah 4:6
I don't deserve any of this. All I've done is beg for mercy and fast for brokenness. While I believe there is a kind of connection between this and God's blessings, I can't be dogmatic or treat it like some kind of if/then equation. God has simply shown mercy and been good to me!
When you live with depression, times like these are indescribably refreshing. All I want to do is tell people how good God really is! I am humbled by and ashamed of my lack of faith in His goodness when things seemed darkest; but, I am so very encouraged by how His love, mercy, goodness, and all the rest don't waiver no matter how much I do!
Here is a trustworthy saying:
If we died with him,
we will also live with him;
if we endure,
we will also reign with him.
If we disown him,
he will also disown us;
if we are faithless,
he remains faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.
- 2 Timothy 2:11-13
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